tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41115591178563854152024-02-06T21:18:05.668-08:00No Rhyme. No Reason.gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.comBlogger52125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-58013149872113175682019-06-02T00:51:00.005-07:002019-07-25T01:11:29.103-07:00<div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="dgj3t" data-offset-key="1t6ju-0-0" style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: pre-wrap;">
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<b style="-webkit-text-stroke: rgb(21, 23, 25);">BUT WHERE TO?</b>
</div>
<div style="color: #1c1e21;">
</div>
<div class="p1" style="color: #1c1e21;">
<span class="s1"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: inherit;">I need to escape</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-family: inherit;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">From this country of chaos</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="font-family: inherit;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Escape the mind games</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="font-family: inherit;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The hate and its sowers</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The rumors and the mongerers</span><span class="Apple-converted-space" style="font-family: inherit;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The haze of the false and the fake</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The hubris and humiliation</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">All the death and destruction</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Escape the change that came</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Escape the mad maddening crowd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I need to escape in my mind</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Or from my own mind</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Escape my own worries</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">My own thoughts</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">And hide in a rainbow world of unicorns and giant cupcakes</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Where I don't sweat, where I don't fret</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Where people are crazy in the way I like</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Where evil creatures are a figment of the imagination</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Where safety is not even a word</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Because the opposite is not even a concept</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Where there are no dreams of escape</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I need</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">I want</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">I have</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">To escape</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">And it hurts that I long</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">To escape
</span><span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">This haven where my heart is</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">The home of my history</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">The land I love</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">But for sanity and security</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">I must</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">Escape</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">Inward</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">Backward</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">Forward</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">To a different dimension</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">Anywhere but here</span><br />
<span style="color: #151719; font-family: inherit;">Any time but now</span></div>
<div style="color: #1c1e21;">
</div>
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</div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-47950956992051247382016-01-05T21:02:00.004-08:002019-07-25T01:54:58.115-07:00Never Ever<div style="font-family: UICTFontTextStyleTallBody; font-size: 17px;">
<br />
<div>
And when all is done<br />
<div>
And my life is on a countdown of days</div>
<div>
When my lungs heave their last few rounds of inhalation and exhalation</div>
<div>
And I look back at a life just about finished</div>
<div>
Will my breath be laced with regrets</div>
<div>
Will I sigh about the book i never wrote</div>
<div>
The song I never sang out loud</div>
<div>
The city I've been meaning to visit but never did </div>
<div>
The poetry forgotten</div>
<div>
The world I never changed </div>
<div>
The talent I buried </div>
<div>
The gifts I never gave</div>
<div>
The apology I withheld </div>
<div>
The hug I was too shy to give</div>
<div>
The compliment I hesitated to utter</div>
<div>
The gospel I was too afraid to preach</div>
<div>
The goodness I held back</div>
<div>
The speech I forgot to deliver </div>
<div>
The film I never saw </div>
</div>
<div>
The literature I was too lazy or overwhelmed to read</div>
<div>
The moment i did not seize</div>
<div>
The bucket list I didn't even bother with </div>
<div>
The instructions I never gave</div>
<div>
The craft I never mastered </div>
<div>
The bungee jump I never took </div>
<div>
The ocean depth I did not plumb</div>
<div>
The leap I did not take<br />
The love I limited</div>
<div>
The me I did not discover</div>
<div>
The inertia I did not overcome</div>
<div>
The fear that kept me from trying</div>
<div>
The brakes I stepped on to keep me from soaring</div>
<div>
Will the unfinished business I never even started</div>
<div>
Drag my spirit down </div>
<div>
As my body gives in </div>
<div>
And all the dreams I gave up on</div>
<div>
Die with me? </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
</div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-29355359682115832282015-03-08T10:18:00.001-07:002015-04-02T01:00:46.001-07:00Dr. Kwak Kwak, Tulungan Mo Kami!<div class="MsoNormal">
(My first Tagalog poem. If I don't count that one I submitted for Filipino 12)<br />
<br />
Nakapulupot ang buhay ko sa buhay mo.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kamay, braso, hita ko’y nakadikit<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sa kamay, braso’t hita mo.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ang puso ko ay nakaepoxy sa iyong puso<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sa ayaw natin o sa gusto<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ang mga araw at taong pinagdaanan ko’y <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Hindi mapipilas sa kwento ng iyong nakaraan<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ang kasalukuyan ko, ang gagawin ko ngayong araw na ‘to<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ay ano pa, e di nakatahi sa araw mo<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
At bukas, ikaw pa rin ang aking kambal tuko<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kahit subukan kong pumiglas<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kahit minsan sa iyong mukha ako’y nababanas<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kahit parang masmadaling dumiskarte ang mag-isa<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kahit minsan ayoko na talaga<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Bakit parang hindi kaya pag ika’y wala? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakapulupot ang buhay ko sa buhay mo<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sa gabi pag natutulog, ang higpit ng yakap mo<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sa araw kahit wala ka ay parang nandyan ka pa rin<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nagkabuhol buhol na ang mga parte ng katawan natin<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Kahit si Dr. Kwak Kwak ay hindi tayo kayang paghiwalayin.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Para tayong preso ng isa’t isa<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Magparole man, hindi pa rin tatakas<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakapako tayo sa package deal na pangako<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nagsumpaang walang iwanan <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Life sentence na nga ba ‘to? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakatali, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakaganchilyo,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Pinagdikit ng rugby, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakakandado at tinapon ang susi,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakapulupot ako sa’yo.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakapulupot ang ating mga ugat <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Mga bituka nati’y naka-superglue<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nakapalupot ang buhay ko sa buhay mo<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Dinikit ng kola ng panahon, ng karanasan, ng kasal na legal,<o:p></o:p></div>
Ng pangagailan, at higit sa lahat, ng malagkit na pagmamahal<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-43654887071324293092015-02-22T07:56:00.002-08:002015-04-02T01:02:00.390-07:00Nil<br />
And when the spell is gone,<br />
When the magic of the moment vanishes,<br />
And the heat, the ardor of going through the fire<br />
Leaves nothing but the memory of embers,<br />
When the river of tears dries up,<br />
Leaving a bed cracked and arid,<br />
When the season of the storm<br />
Has turned into the parch of summer,<br />
When the quake leaves no more tremors,<br />
And the sea has calmed down<br />
Except for the currents down in the deep,<br />
When the piercing pain<br />
Has become a numb ache,<br />
When the anger and the hurt<br />
Have been wiped out from a calloused heart,<br />
By the need to heal and move on,<br />
When the scab has disappeared<br />
Leaving a hint of a scar,<br />
Barely visible, except to the eyes of those who know.<br />
When the desperation of threatened love<br />
Turns back into the complacency of security,<br />
When the chase is over,<br />
And the battle ends with the compromise of a ceasefire,<br />
When the fight fades into a sigh,<br />
When the mundane sets in<br />
And we once more become fixtures<br />
Nailed, hitched, anchored,<br />
Easy, willing, accessible property,<br />
Clad in a house dress,<br />
Wrapped in layers of everyday dust,<br />
Invisible,<br />
Prosaic,<br />
A nagging presence,<br />
Been there, done that,<br />
And ennui becomes a comfort,<br />
And comfort becomes a curse,<br />
What then?<br />
What next?<br />
Just waiting for the next upheaval,<br />
Bracing for a storm<br />
That we miss<br />
But we wish would never come.gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-52634040514185175272015-01-26T19:13:00.004-08:002015-01-27T06:06:55.320-08:00Tints and ShadesDon't we all<br />
<br />
Forgive our lovers<br />
Soon to be lovers<br />
Imagined lovers<br />
Their foibles<br />
We turn a blind eye<br />
To their flaws<br />
<br />
See halos where others don't<br />
And allow the haze to hide the horns<br />
Blemishes apparent to them<br />
Invisible to our clouded vision<br />
There's comfort in our prejudices<br />
Solace in our imagination<br />
<br />
We don our tinted glasses<br />
To blur the blotches of a frail character<br />
We camouflage crimes<br />
Obfuscate offenses<br />
We squint, we blink, we look away<br />
We deny, we justify, we glossify<br />
<br />
Because to burst the bubble of belief<br />
Would be too hard to bear<br />
Uncoupling too far from comfort<br />
To be lonely is to be lost<br />
Because identity is never isolated<br />
And to belong is worth the price of oblivion<br />
<br />
Better to stay imprisoned in our illusions<br />
Better to remain ensconced<br />
In our cocoon of conveniences<br />
Our sentinel of sentimental attachments<br />
This fortress of fog is our haven<br />
To be cushioned in clouds is bliss<br />
<br />
Because superheroes are dead<br />
And what use are our armors<br />
If they're far and not entwined around us<br />
To protect our tender hearts and egos<br />
Because saints are up in heaven<br />
So we kiss the feet of the ones beside us<br />
<br />
We put our blinders on<br />
For the eternal ecstasy of<br />
Evening embraces<br />
For the luxury of lust<br />
The privilege of pairing<br />
For a lifetime supply of kisses and caresses<br />
<br />
After all, who else could endure<br />
Who else could dismiss the lapses<br />
But the one who loves the most<br />
The one who knows the deepest reasons<br />
The one who sees the hidden motives<br />
The one who's already given to the point of bleeding<br />
<br />
Because maybe it's all damn worth it<br />
Maybe the end will justify the pains<br />
And in the meantime we hide our minds in shadows<br />
And drench our hearts in numbing potions<br />
And fog up our goggles and reinforce our helmets<br />
And we stay and we love to the point of blindness and amnesia<br />
<br />
And in return<br />
We become heroes too<br />
Objects of adoration<br />
Beloved beneficiaries of gratitude<br />
Saints saving sinners with imagined halos<br />
Loved with and without conditions<br />
<br />
And we too are forgiven<br />
Our sins concealed under comforters<br />
Our faults forgotten too<br />
Our freckled pockmarked faces filtered<br />
By eyes beholden, tinted, shaded, blinded<br />
By hearts held captive by time, tide, and the turbulence of togetherness<br />
<br />
Don't we all?<br />
<br />gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-12576776429112969792015-01-26T18:20:00.003-08:002015-01-26T18:20:22.986-08:00Status<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">Restless, listless, like ants are crawling under my skin</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">Anxious, aching; feelings simmering into a boil</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">Disconcerted, agitated; the pea under my bed is growing</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">Seething, bleeding; finding words to paint the color of my angst</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302948px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">And failing</span>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-47647779892105235162014-10-02T15:17:00.002-07:002014-10-02T22:13:36.112-07:00Ripples and Reactions<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
When you shatter the peace of my worlds, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Do not expect me to be still.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Do not expect me to pretend that I'm fine.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Do not expect me to shut down my own hurts.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Do not expect me to be dense,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To shut up, to act unaffected.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
When a butterfly flaps its wings<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
In a land distant from mine,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
It sends a signal to my bubble of space,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Heats up the skies above my head,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Stirs the air around me,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Agitates, stirs, moves the clouds to cry,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To form oceans and whirlpools<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
That cover the walking surfaces of my world.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
When you breathe, the energy you expel, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Disturbs the molecules around me.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The germs of your heart seep into mine.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The virus of your thoughts <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Do not stay quarantined in your head.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
It finds its way out,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Spreading, invading, infecting,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Whether we like it or not, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Whether you planned it or not,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
No matter how we protest that it shouldn't be.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Because no one lives in a vacuum.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
No one exists in isolation. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
There's an ecological balance to relationships. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
There's an interconnection, a fine thread that runs, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Snaking its way through minds, hearts, hands, spirit<br />
In parties, conversations, coffee dates, meetings, <br />
In heavy musings, rabid messaging, and silent sighs,<br />
In the wee hours of mornings, the bright glare of days,<br />
At night when the loneliness weighs down,<br />
Or that last wishful prayer before the dreams set in, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Poking, binding, blinding,<br />
Strangling, chafing, knotting, weaving, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Killing, stifling, sticking,<br />
Holding, healing, breathing life.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I am not blind.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I am not callous.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I am not impervious.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I feel.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I see.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I think.<br />
I reason.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I love. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I seethe.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I rebel.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I hurt when someone hurts. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I flinch when someone pinches someone else.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Just like you do.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
If you can't control your passions, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Then don't try to control mine.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
If you can't fix your emotions, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Then do not manipulate my own.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I cannot sit in a little peg <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
In a world you have designed<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To be quaint and quiet,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Where only you can feel.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
You cannot will me to be still.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I cannot gag my ideas to suit yours. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
When you exercise your right to emote.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Know that that privilege causes you to provoke.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To goad, to peeve, to alter the emotional landscape. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
For you do not hold the franchise to feelings.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Newton said it--Any action <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Is met by an equal and opposite reaction, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
You offend; I defend.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
You launch; I punch. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
You push, I shove.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
You hate, I protect whom I love.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Maybe I can respect your decisions.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Maybe I can see your point of view. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But would you respect my right<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To react, to feel, to speak up in anger?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Ripples in nature, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Waves in the sea,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Fissures on the earth,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Geological shakeups of the past.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
This leads to this, and that causes that.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The whispered ire, the secret roars<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Escape their dark places,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To gather momentum,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And explode. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And hit everything on the path. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
What's shattered is shattered.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The shards of what you've broken<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Have turned to dust,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Blown away by the wind, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Then a speck lodges in my eye. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Though I've tried to remain stoic, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And tried to keep my peace, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Holding on to the pieces salvaged, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
In a world that’s been ravaged, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
My hand has to let go, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To wipe away the sting. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And yet the memory of that speck <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Lingers, still hurting my eye. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And I cry<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
For a world forever changed</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
For a time now long gone.<o:p></o:p></div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-74431237917502732772013-11-19T10:37:00.000-08:002013-11-20T04:50:55.337-08:00Debris<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Debris,flotsam, jetsam, garbage, wreckage, floating trash,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Corrugated metal folded like paper, a book destroyed, all junk.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Carcasses of trees, shards of glass, iron rods, a refrigerator door, a hand,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">A shoe without its pair, unidentifiable things, soggy rubber, clothes off somebody's back,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Dogs, cattle, pigs that could not swim, a child's plush toy, a bench, a lucky charm,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Somebody's father, a neighbor, a stranger from another village, a lot of stuff.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">What used to be a roof, a student's backpack, now all useless crap.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Uprooted crops not ready for harvest, a teenager not ready to die,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Shanty dweller, man, woman, child, elder, sister, enemy, friend, someone's lover,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">She who lived in a concrete house, he who had two cars, they who had none,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Business man, kanto boy, tambay, police man, priest, a convicted thug,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The village gossip, the righteous one, the one reviled, and one well liked.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #666666;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #666666;">Residue of a life that was</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Remnants of days that now seem so long ago</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Of that quiet time before the storm</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Wreckage of families, separated, decimated,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Bodies of children who escaped their parents' grasp,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Corpses never given a chance to say goodbye,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Drifting to the sea,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Carried helplessly,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Washed away from home,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Swept away, then gone.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #666666;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #666666;">The angry water did not choose.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The storm surge had no favorites.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The howling force of the wind did not discriminate.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Yolanda was blind; she took without regard to who or what.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The fury vengeance of mother earth simply struck everything on its path.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Everything, everyone was equal, all fair game.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">It wasn't the clever nor the richer who survived.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Not the braver, the stronger, nor one more deserving to die.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Just whoever, whatever, whichever.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Random and impersonal as can be; they're all debris.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #666666;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #666666;">She struck, swept, smacked,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Stole, swiped, slayed.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And then just as abruptly, she left.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And in her stillness, the shock.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The deafening stillness after the roaring waves.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And the last struggling leaf fell on the littered ground,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Waking up those who did not die.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And they stirred, and they moved, and they searched</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Through the debris, the flotsam, and the jetsam</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Searching for hope, for nanay, for kuya, for remains of life.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #666666;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #666666;">Debris, detritus, sludge, scrap, and crud</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Cover the earth for miles around.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Under the garbage, signs of life.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Under the rubble, somebody rises.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Behind the glazed eyes too tired to weep,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Remnants of a heart ready to fight,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">To eat, to lash back, to survive, to fight for what's left behind,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">To move on, to forgive, to forget, to flee, </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">To find a new place, a new reason, a new season, a new cause,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #666666;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Amid the debris, the vestiges, the leftover matter, yes, hope remains.</span></span><br />
<br />gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-24794734612705051882013-09-27T06:28:00.003-07:002013-09-27T18:05:38.923-07:00The Saddest MonthSeptember is the saddest month<br />
When a sister sighs<br />
When a mother cries<br />
When her man reaches out to empty space<br />
When a child grows another year older<br />
Without a mom<br />
When the wind whispers her name<br />
And hearts remember the pain<br />
When years are counted<br />
Stories recounted<br />
When the nightmare of ten days<br />
Of the longest goodbye<br />
Flashes slowly in the mind's eye<br />
When memories of a sweet, innocent past<br />
Of living oblivious to loss<br />
Untouched by death<br />
In the bliss of ignorance<br />
In the happy shadow of denial<br />
Are relived and achingly replayed<br />
When fervent, hopeless wishes<br />
Are whispered to heaven<br />
To please, please go back to that time<br />
Before naive peace was shattered<br />
This saddest month<br />
When a father hugs the air<br />
And best friends stifle tears<br />
When dreams are haunted<br />
And photo albums revisited<br />
When songs awaken<br />
Sleeping sentiments<br />
When questions are asked<br />
And secret regrets surface<br />
When wrinkles deepen<br />
When the the rifts in my soul widen<br />
When the anesthesia wears off<br />
And the numbness turns into<br />
A smarting tender sore<br />
September, sometimes I hate you<br />
<br />gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-9281710855894439292013-07-06T08:29:00.001-07:002013-07-06T08:30:17.253-07:00Not Here<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
In the middle of raucous chatter<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of familial ribbing and laughter<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The noise of nothingness shatters<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
That familiar emptiness shouts out a whisper<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And then I remember<o:p></o:p></div>
I miss her<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-66290799662571907182013-06-09T08:37:00.001-07:002013-06-09T08:38:56.307-07:00Ode to the Invention Called the Shower<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7wUlh9vj7lbzp2egvvnppDsLAsXpGsnDBpWxydnHyKirbi_LQqpMzOhyphenhyphenVEQrV4PyeJAz9EZNs3AEgIpE230-ArPVTLqt39Tjx7nzxKVRonRRVctBMe1d0YFd4aFZ2PJvKIlMXSd_Ke84H/s1600/rubber+ducky.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7wUlh9vj7lbzp2egvvnppDsLAsXpGsnDBpWxydnHyKirbi_LQqpMzOhyphenhyphenVEQrV4PyeJAz9EZNs3AEgIpE230-ArPVTLqt39Tjx7nzxKVRonRRVctBMe1d0YFd4aFZ2PJvKIlMXSd_Ke84H/s320/rubber+ducky.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
That first collision of the cold splash of water<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With the steaming heat of my scalp<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Followed by the explosion of ecstasy <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And the escape of a moan <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
From a mouth minutes ago was cursing summer<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And I feel like I was the one to discover<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The opposite of fire<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And so I melt in a ball of exquisite joy<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of utter surrender<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Whispering a prayer to the God of water<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And I let the rivulets of pleasure<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Drizzle my hair<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Trickle down my face<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tickle my back<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Embrace my chest<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wash away the grime<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Obliterate summer’s sweat<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And expunge the heat <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And erase the hate <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For this torrid bleeping weather<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The curse of being a tropical creature<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ah, this magnificent shower<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This splash of relief<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
If only I could stay here forever</div>
<o:p></o:p>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-40363366949314069082013-06-09T08:01:00.002-07:002019-07-25T01:54:29.625-07:00A Stanza for my Sister<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieQHVn1-T93ZqsYcvOHQUjNZzXPXhW7YiKUJML6TdiIYUYM3_IcRsRf6oZGa0sSfpwPj-d9zYXl6MhWKVXSmLNgUO7bOfuOFKWXtaawUqGusQMVVcFdEa4C_P3aq09E_pd5EjGtlPSANRy/s1600/rita+in+the+water.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieQHVn1-T93ZqsYcvOHQUjNZzXPXhW7YiKUJML6TdiIYUYM3_IcRsRf6oZGa0sSfpwPj-d9zYXl6MhWKVXSmLNgUO7bOfuOFKWXtaawUqGusQMVVcFdEa4C_P3aq09E_pd5EjGtlPSANRy/s1600/rita+in+the+water.jpg" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">A whisper in my heart, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a conversation in my dream, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a gap in my soul, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a universe of memories in my mind, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a tear in my eye, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">an ache in my gut, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a hope in my spirit, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a yearning in my chest, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">your absence</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: "lucida grande" , "tahoma" , "verdana" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">a never disappearing presence in my life.</span>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-49647776342185193952013-05-11T11:15:00.002-07:002013-05-11T20:47:38.084-07:00The Scent of Mother <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhORe1gB5X9Uyt1h10gICpGBumhSi7lxbBkM34UbHbXenRShHtp7648OZ9ZrZ3nDjKbQGpcBvzGS-y_z8-EKUVmD7V7yILtnKwf9QOr0gzgCV8qNxdWCiXuGLvT7peP1UIZtTZwhaKmiawZ/s1600/mom+in+garden.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhORe1gB5X9Uyt1h10gICpGBumhSi7lxbBkM34UbHbXenRShHtp7648OZ9ZrZ3nDjKbQGpcBvzGS-y_z8-EKUVmD7V7yILtnKwf9QOr0gzgCV8qNxdWCiXuGLvT7peP1UIZtTZwhaKmiawZ/s1600/mom+in+garden.jpg" /></a></div>
At night, she gets out of the shower</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
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A scent of alcohol and baby powder<o:p></o:p></div>
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Trailing after her<o:p></o:p></div>
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Smelling like clean and comfort<o:p></o:p></div>
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And sweet dreams and safety<o:p></o:p></div>
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She throws the sheets up in the air<o:p></o:p></div>
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Casting off dust and bed monsters<o:p></o:p></div>
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That whiff of happy <o:p></o:p></div>
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Filling the room<o:p></o:p></div>
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Assuring, protecting, calming<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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When my tummy aches<o:p></o:p></div>
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When I cry in pain<o:p></o:p></div>
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She fills my lungs<o:p></o:p></div>
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With the scent of magic potions<o:p></o:p></div>
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Vicks vaporub and manzanilla<o:p></o:p></div>
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No medicine's more potent <o:p></o:p></div>
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Than her touch like magic<o:p></o:p></div>
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Her kiss a healing tonic<o:p></o:p></div>
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And the scent of mommy's love<o:p></o:p></div>
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Chases the pain away<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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She comes in from the garden<o:p></o:p></div>
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Smelling of sun and soil <o:p></o:p></div>
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Of nature and nurturing<o:p></o:p></div>
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Of green grass and growing things<o:p></o:p></div>
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The biggest wonder<o:p></o:p></div>
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Is that no matter how dusty <o:p></o:p></div>
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And dirty she gets<o:p></o:p></div>
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Her sweat is the scent<o:p></o:p></div>
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Of freshness and health<o:p></o:p></div>
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Of rainbows and garden joy<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Nothing in the world<o:p></o:p></div>
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Can smell better<o:p></o:p></div>
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No factory can make<o:p></o:p></div>
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No shop can sell<o:p></o:p></div>
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Nothing can top<br />
Nothing can comfort like<o:p></o:p><br />
Nothing will replace</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
That heady scent <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
That heavenly embrace <o:p></o:p></div>
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Of that perfume called mother<o:p></o:p></div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-63051960480881989312013-04-28T08:12:00.000-07:002013-04-28T08:12:42.850-07:00Ode to SummerWhen it's summer in the Philippines, it sizzles. So much so that I've been inspired to write poetry. Two poems, in fact. One in Tagalog and another in my version of Shakespeare English.<br />
<br />
These are just poems for fun.<br />
<br />
Pambahay<br />
<br />
Kapag tag-init, payatot, tabachingching pantay pantay<br />
Normal lang na ang mga outfit nating pambahay<br />
Ay saksakan ng nipis, iksi, at kupas ng kulay<br />
Mga tisert na sobra nang gutay-gutay<br />
Napagkakamalang basahan ng kasambahay<br />
Mga perpec shorts na super mahalay<br />
Kasi naman ang ineeeet, haay!<br />
<br />
Shakesfear (written after reading some Shakespeare)<br />
<br />
Praytell, what's this mefeel<br />
Raging heat from head to heel<br />
Burning innards, sweating crook, oh dear<br />
Yet still, I need to wear a brassier!<br />
<br />
<br />gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-19292262412914603352013-04-25T06:49:00.001-07:002013-04-25T06:51:14.897-07:00No Choice<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
She stands in the middle of the intersection<o:p></o:p></div>
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with no hint of shade for cover.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Her sweaty brow,<o:p></o:p></div>
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her carbon filled lungs ignored<o:p></o:p></div>
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as she makes cars go to and fro. <o:p></o:p></div>
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No time to whine,<o:p></o:p></div>
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no time to wonder <o:p></o:p></div>
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if all is worth the exhaustion<o:p></o:p></div>
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as she inhales the exhaust of the city,<o:p></o:p></div>
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exhales the unheard sighs,<o:p></o:p></div>
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even manages to smile.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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He wades in morass <o:p></o:p></div>
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in a little cube of stench.<o:p></o:p></div>
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To worry about bacteria<o:p></o:p></div>
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that an ocean of hand gel cannot squelch<o:p></o:p></div>
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is a rich man’s concern.<o:p></o:p></div>
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To be alive to smell the shit is bliss. <o:p></o:p></div>
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He thinks he’s lucky <o:p></o:p></div>
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for to be working today,<o:p></o:p></div>
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to be called to swim in other people’s crap<o:p></o:p></div>
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is a blessing, an assurance<o:p></o:p></div>
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that today there’ll be food on the table <o:p></o:p></div>
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there’ll be a scrap of cash.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Her father says she’s doing it for the family.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Her mother says she’ll do it anyway for free.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Might as well be paid to open her legs<o:p></o:p></div>
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to men too ugly inside<o:p></o:p></div>
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that they have to pay for it.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Her innocence is worth nothing.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Her honor cannot be eaten.<o:p></o:p></div>
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What use is worrying about a lost childhood?<o:p></o:p></div>
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What point is there in saving her purity<o:p></o:p></div>
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when staying alive is not a guaranteed option? <o:p></o:p></div>
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She just closes her eyes and takes it<o:p></o:p></div>
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as she tells her soul to die silently.<o:p></o:p></div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-21658252043796483202013-03-07T07:11:00.002-08:002013-06-03T20:00:27.984-07:00WYSIWYG<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">
<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><img src="http://www.highdisplay.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/1980s-computer-monitor3.jpg" /></span><br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span>
<!--[endif]--><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 6pt;">
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">From Wikipedia
on WYSIWYG: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 6pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">The phrase was coined in 1982 by Larry Sinclair, an engineer at
Triple I (Information International, Inc.), to express the idea that what the
user sees on the screen is what the user gets on the printer while using the
"page layout system", a pre-press typesetting system first shown at
ANPS in Las Vegas. The phrase was popularized by a newsletter published by
Arlene and Jose Ramos, called WYSIWYG. It was created for the emerging
Pre-Press industry going electronic in the late 1970s. After three years of
publishing, the newsletter was sold to employees at the Stanford Research
Institute in California.<o:p></o:p></span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></i>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i>The prhrase "Whay you see is what you get," from which the acronym derives, was a catchphrase popularized by Flip Wilson's drag personal "Geraldine" (from Rowan; Martin's Laugh-in in the late 1960s. Geraldine would often say it to excuse her quirky behavior. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i>*end of quote*</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i>And what do you know, my other name is Geraldine. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><i>Now, tack to the poem.</i></span></div>
<div style="background: white; margin-bottom: 6.0pt; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-top: 0in;">
<br /></div>
</div>
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<br /></div>
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WYSIWYG<br />
<br />
What you see<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Is what I am<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I won’t pretend to be deep<o:p></o:p></div>
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I won’t cast furtive, sideway glances<o:p></o:p></div>
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To make you think I’m enigmatic<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I won’t give you cryptic lines<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To show a shadow of something dark<o:p></o:p></div>
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Hidden, lurking behind a half-smile<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
No. If I try to be perplexing<o:p></o:p></div>
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And pretend to be mystifying<o:p></o:p></div>
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I will laugh at myself<o:p></o:p></div>
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And then I’ll make you a PowerPoint slide<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To be sure you get<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
What I’m really saying <o:p></o:p></div>
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If you call me mysterious<o:p></o:p></div>
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I’ll say you’re full of crap<o:p></o:p></div>
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Figuratively, of course.<o:p></o:p><br />
Figures of speech, I shun </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Preferring the literal <o:p></o:p></div>
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What you see is <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
What there is<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Yes, I have my dirty secrets<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But who doesn’t?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But the Venn diagram <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of what I show outside<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And what I am inside <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
In the well-lit caverns of my psyche<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Is a fairly expansive circle<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Because my life is one big open book<o:p></o:p></div>
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The spine split wide open<o:p></o:p></div>
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The pages dog-eared and well worn<o:p></o:p></div>
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With nothing much in between the lines <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The story of my life is open source<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Password not required<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Because I can be a whore for attention<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Desperate for a reaction<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
My status even strangers <br />
And their friends of friends know about<br />
What I had for dinner <br />
Snapped and posted<br />
Liked and commented<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Shared and quoted <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
My brain is not a mollusk shell<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
With meandering paths <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And unexplored tunnels<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
My guts are spilled<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
For all the world to see<br />
My innards exposed<br />
My heart bared<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
If anyone cared to look<br />
Every little pang of emotion documented<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Every imagined poignancy exploited<br />
You see, I’m in the in the business of sharing <br />
Distributing the little that I know <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
People pay to learn about the stuff <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I manage to google and stuff inside my <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Pretty uncomplicated noggin<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I prefer the efficiency of information<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Over the enchantment of the unknown<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I have no time to be coy<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I have no patience for innuendos<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Unless they’re the funny, dirty kind<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Which you say with an obvious wink wink<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
That makes me guffaw because I got your joke <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I know, I know<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I’m boring<br />
But really, the need to be clear <br />
Far outweighs the need to be sublime<br />
Metaphors confuse me<br />
The metaphysical can never trump <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The clarity of reality<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The ambiguous leaves me confused<br />
Hints flummox my simple mind<br />
Just hit me with the truth any time<br />
And I’ll say thank you for telling it to me bluntly<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Yes, that means I'm shallow<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Like a saucer <br />
Wide open<br />
Unlocked, ajar<br />
Spreadeagled<br />
Uncovered<br />
Your irony will probably escape me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
If you say no, I hear no<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
If you say you’re hungry<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I assume you need food<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And not that your soul <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Is famished <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Or your spirit ravenous<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
For some nebulous craving<br />
Look at my face<br />
And you see pretty much the wall behind me<br />
Transparent like cellophane<br />
Predictable like August rain<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Symbols my ass<br />
Semiotics—a pain<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
What you see<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Whether you like it or not<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Is what you get<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br />
So the question is<br />
Why rest from prose<br />
Why poetize<br />
Why deviate from paragraphs<o:p></o:p></div>
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And delve into stanzas<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I don’t know<br />
It's just that sometimes<br />
When I least expect it<br />
A word gurgles out<o:p></o:p></div>
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From somewhere visceral<br />
A bubble of a thought <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Refuses to conform to the regular syntax<br />
And the enter button insists <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
On moving to the next line<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Leaving the last one unpunctuated<br />
To form narrow columns<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Instead of broad walls of text<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I don’t know where they come from<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
There is rarely rhyme<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And even less common—reason <br />
I don't even know<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
How to do it right<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But who cares <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I just write<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
What feels like poetry<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Listening intently<o:p></o:p></div>
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To the uncontrolled sentiments<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The unstructured statements<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And I relax my silly grammar rules<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And let the words flow<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Unfenced by patterns<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Unhampered by justified margins<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And they just pour out<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Unbidden <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Uninvited <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Unhinged <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Disorganized <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
A jumble of misplaced ideas<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And molted musings<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Spewed out<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
From a place uncharted<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Maybe somewhere<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
In a body drenched with words<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Somewhere in there<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Where I’ve never bothered to look<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Just maybe<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Just maybe <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
I’m deep after all<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Or not <o:p></o:p></div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-91091711590984620952013-02-25T19:59:00.001-08:002013-02-25T22:08:43.841-08:00When Walls Talk<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinaG4Xog-93xvT8jEewJ0AIiL0gJyGTQcPLCCvGET7wk6Oz-415QN8yh78hyTLMDkVFRg5chgLPqrx9IUXQIbMKjZFeCxlodEI_qVIy-E694gDHFYiE_4L13NT7l0i-wwMycfoYRfEqc6R/s1600/greenmeadows.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinaG4Xog-93xvT8jEewJ0AIiL0gJyGTQcPLCCvGET7wk6Oz-415QN8yh78hyTLMDkVFRg5chgLPqrx9IUXQIbMKjZFeCxlodEI_qVIy-E694gDHFYiE_4L13NT7l0i-wwMycfoYRfEqc6R/s320/greenmeadows.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Stained, blotched, faded<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Silent walls, three decades standing<o:p></o:p></div>
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Now heaving heavy of only memories<o:p></o:p></div>
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Housing emptyness</div>
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Covering only remnants of everyday living</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The leftover matter <o:p></o:p></div>
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Once considered valuable enough to store<o:p></o:p></div>
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Now discarded <o:p></o:p></div>
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Or just waiting for the next truck to fetch them<o:p></o:p></div>
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Walls sheltering no breathing creatures <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Just ghosts and lingering scents <o:p></o:p></div>
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Of food and events and human beings<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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They stand, lonely, lamenting<o:p></o:p></div>
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Mocking me for moving on<o:p></o:p></div>
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After years of faithful protecting<o:p></o:p></div>
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From rain, heat, and bullets of soldiers rebelling<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
From a world so harsh and ugly at times<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
From the glare of the sun and scorching truth<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
From the stench of the city<o:p></o:p></div>
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From the poverty some call reality<o:p></o:p></div>
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They’ve done their best<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To be a fortress, a haven, a default safety <o:p></o:p></div>
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Where masks, bras, and pretensions are removed<o:p></o:p></div>
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Where one puts on a bullet-proof blanket of comfort <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
How dare I leave now <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Where is my loyalty?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But they oblige<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
They shrug shoulders they don’t have<o:p></o:p></div>
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And give in to the inevitable<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
They say go, go, move one<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
We cannot stop you from living<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
After all, you left a long time ago<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
When you married that man from the south<o:p></o:p></div>
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And the walls envelop me <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Forgiving me for leaving<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Trying to hide their weeping<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But before you go, they say<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Let us talk<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And I let them<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And they talk of a family too eager to move in<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Bringing salt and icons in a home filled with dust<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And furniture too few that the house shook<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Then filling the house with dreams and plans<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And stories, not all of them fun<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Filling the home with people, even not their own<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
With all sorts of things and things and things<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And things and toys and books and stuff and things<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
With love and love and love and love<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls talk<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of new wave parties in the 80s<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of college buddies hanging, chilling<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of sleepovers too many to count<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The corners whisper of sins and secrets<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of stealing daddy’s ciggies to learn how to smoke<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of playing hooky and getting a hicky<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of stealthy kisses<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And experimental gropings in the dark<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of growing up and throwing up <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of grounded days and loveless nights<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of love or what we thought was love<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls snicker remembering<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Bad fashion and worse music<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of bawling teenagers thinking <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
That this is the world ending <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of emo moments and bad hair days<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And angst-ridden diary entries<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of children hating parents<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Who loved us even when they wanted to strangle us<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of two silly brothers fighting over briefs<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Killing each other over nothing<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
These walls giggle about jokes and pranks <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And Ogs’s many emergency room trips<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls cannot count how many nights<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
A father waited anxiously <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Inspecting rooms, doing a roll call<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Praying for the safety of those not yet home<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of losing sleep worrying how the hell<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
He would find tuition for <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
These lazy, reluctant students<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Who only cared about Saturdays<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Whose expensive books remained unopened<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of children oblivious to the love<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
They speak of a mother always screaming frantically<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
But just us passionately giving all, loving us loudly <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
The walls confess of hearing confessions<br />
Of people alone in rooms<br />
Of pains shared in the stillness<br />
When nobody else was listening<br />
The walls sing of hidden joys<br />
Of the smiles one hides<br />
Of hearts being punctured<br />
Egos being bruised<br />
Of brothers and sisters fighting<br />
Not talking, pretending not to care<br />
Of love unspoken<br />
Because it's uncool to be sweet to your sibling<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls hush of family secrets</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of pregnant announcements<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And embarrassing separations<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of family dysfunctions we thought <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Nobody else had<o:p></o:p><br />
Of dirty linen kept where they should be<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Hidden, forgotten<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls speak of heart-scarring hurts<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
And gut-wrenching breakthroughs<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Graduations, weddings, birthdays<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls saw the growing up<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Of awful kids transforming into awesome adults<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
The walls remember<br />
Parties, preparing for parties<br />
Dreaming of parties<br />
Parties that went too far<br />
Of drunken people sprawled on the floor<br />
Of cleaning up after the nights of reverie<br />
The walls will miss<br />
The people<br />
People visiting<br />
People overstaying<br />
But more than anyone,<br />
The people who lived, slept, breathed, dreamed, grew, gave, loved in it<br />
<br />
And then the walls grow silent<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
Remembering a sister<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
For whom this house is just not big enough<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To hold the love<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
To bear the pain of losing her<o:p></o:p></div>
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And maybe that’s why we have to move<o:p></o:p></div>
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Maybe this is where they outlive their use<o:p></o:p></div>
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This is when they say goodbye<o:p></o:p></div>
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One last hug, one last look<o:p></o:p></div>
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To let us move on for fresher air, for new stories<o:p></o:p></div>
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For more graduations, weddings, birthdays<o:p></o:p></div>
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For more love, love, love, and love<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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They're just walls<br />
Concrete, immobile walls<br />
But they speak<br />
They witness<br />
They remember<br />
They cry<br />
They confess<br />
They love<br />
They hurt<br />
They die<br />
Those walls did talk<o:p></o:p></div>
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And I am glad I let them<o:p></o:p></div>
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gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-52638670865465423462013-01-01T06:51:00.000-08:002013-01-01T06:51:23.368-08:00<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">Do you remember the twenty first day of September</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">When I grew up and the child in me died forever</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">When my heart broke into tiny gooey pieces that could never be put back again</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">That now it’s all patched up and cracked, alive but barely recognizable </span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">On the twenty first day of September</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">My sister went into coma</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">Because that stupid tumor just decided to erupt to flood her brain </span><br style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">And all that gray ma</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.800000190734863px; line-height: 18px;">tter just could not be fixed again<br /><br />On the twenty first night of September<br />The floor beneath my feet collapsed<br />And I crumpled into a kicking, writhing ball of denial<br />Screaming the truth away, bawling the undignified howl<br /><br />The days after the twenty first of September<br />Were engulfed in pain that turned to fear that turned to pain again<br />That turned into a numbness pretending to be strength<br />That turned into silence pretending to be peace<br /><br />Ten days after the twenty first of September<br />We were one less sister<br />A million joys poorer<br />Wondering about the meaning of forever<br /><br />So here we are<br />A year after the twenty first day of September<br />Healing, but not quite there<br />Better, but never like before<br /><br />I sigh.<br />I weep without tears.<br />I just want this day to be over.<br />This twenty first day of September.</span>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-78401592942015307582012-04-16T10:15:00.000-07:002012-04-16T10:15:33.712-07:00Where the Hell is Heaven?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
A bit of prose to explain the story of this picture and this poem. It's not a poem I find well written at all. No rhyme, no structure, no art. I was in the car somewhere in Batangas and I looked at the sky. I saw the silver lining of the clouds, admired it, mused over what the silver lining is to Rita's death. And I started wondering as I looked up if Rita looked down at me, at us. I have no biblical references to bank on, and I refuse to accept what people claim to be true just to make people who grieve feel good. This is a hastily written poem on my my IPad, and I do not have the heart, nor the energy, to rework this. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCsvFFqaX7nJK6KN204l8Jz1KqJcTVhII7E75QPh37ivJuW33yrWB-4emU6AN2lnT2J5LITSRvf0DuR-Z5knFGJfaG9havyGzL7QIQP5G2YdOhgGkL7bD2PN5rEJ-KCPxDk_jG5V473Oh1/s1600/silver+lining.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCsvFFqaX7nJK6KN204l8Jz1KqJcTVhII7E75QPh37ivJuW33yrWB-4emU6AN2lnT2J5LITSRvf0DuR-Z5knFGJfaG9havyGzL7QIQP5G2YdOhgGkL7bD2PN5rEJ-KCPxDk_jG5V473Oh1/s320/silver+lining.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<b>Where the Hell is Heaven?</b><br />
<br />
Do you see me <br />
when i look up to the clouds<br />
thinking of you?<br />
<br />
When people tell me <br />
what they think i want to hear<br />
is it true<br />
that you watch over me <br />
from up above?<br />
<br />
Where are you geographically?<br />
Because i've never seen a map<br />
with directions to heaven.<br />
Google 's no use.<br />
<br />
Can you hear me <br />
greet you in the morning?<br />
When I call your name in the darkness<br />
and ask why you had to go away?<br />
<br />
Can you see my face crumple <br />
and my heart crumble<br />
because I still have not stopped mourning,<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
wishing, crying?<br />
<br />
Do you know when my heart is sighing?<br />
Do you feel it when despite the pain I laugh?<br />
Can you feel any better knowing I'm moving on?<br />
<br />
Or are you oblivious<br />
because the joys of heaven <br />
fill your days and sate your needs?<br />
<br />
Do you count the days or years <br />
When we see each other again?<br />
<br />
Do you pray for what i pray for--<br />
a grand reunion of everyone we love.<br />
<br />
All the gadgets and widgets can 't help me<br />
to hear you <br />
see you<br />
have you within arm 's reach.<br />
<br />
Maybe I don't know where heaven is.<br />
But I know you are here<br />
a breath away<br />
in my heart<br />
where you'll be forever<br />
until I can have you again<br />
in a heavenly embrace.gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-38166264456859872512012-04-16T09:41:00.002-07:002013-03-07T07:36:25.397-08:00When?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/419678_10150512653231911_631171910_9400468_495017114_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/419678_10150512653231911_631171910_9400468_495017114_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
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<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<br />
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When do I stop hoping it's not true?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When willl I stop missing you?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When do I stop wishing for the impossible?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When do I stop asking why it happened at all?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When does it sink in?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">How do I move on?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When does it start to make sense?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When willl the grieving be in past perfect tense?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Will I ever feel complete again?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Will I ever find peace that transcends?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Willl there ever be a day when I don't think of you?<br />Will I ever forgive myself for the things I did not do?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br />How do I make the crying stop?<br />How do I tell my nagging brain to shut up?<br />How do I tell my heart not to hurt anymore?<br />All this agony, what is it for?</span></div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; text-align: -webkit-auto;">
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br />When? How? Why?<br />So many questions crowd my mind.<br />And I have to accept that for a lot of them<br />The answers I just won"t find.</span></div>
</div>
</div>
gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-85453520589412356012012-01-10T20:13:00.000-08:002012-04-16T09:42:11.321-07:00My Other LanguageHey, you're here.<br />
I don't come here often.<br />
Because the poet in me cannot be prodded.<br />
Cannot be cajoled.<br />
Cannot be directed.<br />
Cannot even be bribed.<br />
<br />
She stays inert.<br />
Skimming below the surface,<br />
Just observing,<br />
Sensing,<br />
Teasing,<br />
Lurking silently,<br />
Listening stealthily.<br />
<br />
And then when she decides to wake up<br />
And show up<br />
And show off,<br />
She just spews out words,<br />
An outpouring of thoughts,<br />
Gut spill, and heart bursts.<br />
<br />
Rhyme and reason optional.<br />
Eschewing the usual rational<br />
Being who prefers prose,<br />
The language she understands<br />
With structure she can control.<br />
<br />
But poetry-<br />
It's a different animal.<br />
Scary,<br />
Undisciplined,<br />
Raw,<br />
Leaving her vulnerable.<br />
Her insides exposed.<br />
Her masks removed.<br />
<br />
And then suddenly,<br />
It just ceases,<br />
Just like that.<br />
<br />
<br />gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-85826618942506045562011-12-07T22:28:00.001-08:002011-12-07T22:48:41.872-08:00Stifling<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi35DBji_yzgVwasvlYpXWg6unDPwjkwv_xBpJPzy9DgDNjOVCpG40TfAc0wwmIVPOjqri-8YyvYGpPwM7tC-1AsFboPfYGDP0Gq3lKSarRNXRQJyx7GE5Au63TK3apbCPHFM94cQxdopjP/s1600/rita+in+mnk.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi35DBji_yzgVwasvlYpXWg6unDPwjkwv_xBpJPzy9DgDNjOVCpG40TfAc0wwmIVPOjqri-8YyvYGpPwM7tC-1AsFboPfYGDP0Gq3lKSarRNXRQJyx7GE5Au63TK3apbCPHFM94cQxdopjP/s320/rita+in+mnk.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
It doesn't take much<br />
for a memory to resurface<br />
a realization of loss to interrupt a moment<br />
a longing to linger<br />
an ache to assert itself<br />
<br />
And in the middle of running to and fro<br />
of idle thinking<br />
or proactive doing<br />
<br />
In a moment of solitude<br />
or in the midst of a mob<br />
in the act of living<br />
in the business of breathing<br />
<br />
An emotion gurgles<br />
from a visceral place<br />
Surprising<br />
Shocking<br />
Awaking a feeling indescribable<br />
<br />
And I stifle a sob<br />
retract a tear<br />
suffocate a sigh<br />
It only takes a moment<br />
It doesn't take muchgegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-45353684163091690502011-09-27T22:03:00.000-07:002011-10-30T23:43:54.170-07:00GraspingGrasping for miracles<br />
<div>
to bring back what is lost<br />
<div>
Grasping for answers</div>
<div>
to explain the meaning</div>
<div>
behind the pain</div>
<div>
Grasping for breath</div>
<div>
as sobs engulf my lungs</div>
<div>
Grasping for a vision</div>
<div>
behind the haze of tears</div>
<div>
Grasping for God</div>
<div>
to hold my hand</div>
<div>
as I drown in sorrow</div>
<div>
Grasping to to stay afloat</div>
<div>
as my body is weighed down </div>
<div>
by a heart that feels like a ton of bricks</div>
<div>
Grasping for love</div>
<div>
and finding it in family and friends</div>
<div>
Grasping for hope</div>
<div>
Grasping for sleep</div>
<div>
Grasping for rest</div>
<div>
Grasping for silence</div>
<div>
in a mind that never stops making noise</div>
<div>
Grasping for noise</div>
<div>
when all around is silence</div>
<div>
and sadness and emptiness</div>
<div>
Grasping for light</div>
<div>
in a day made darker by a storm</div>
<div>
Grasping her hand</div>
<div>
and willing her to come back</div>
<div>
Grasping for life</div>
<div>
Grasping for control</div>
<div>
Grasping for yesterday</div>
<div>
for memories dulled by an addled mind</div>
<div>
Grasping for joy</div>
<div>
Grasping for peace</div>
<div>
Grasping for comfort</div>
<div>
Grasping for something to numb the pain</div>
<div>
Grasping for normalcy</div>
<div>
Grasping for strength</div>
<div>
not just to stay standing </div>
<div>
but to prop others too</div>
<div>
Grasping to survive</div>
<div>
Breathing</div>
<div>
Inhaling</div>
<div>
Exhaling</div>
<div>
Taking one listless step</div>
<div>
after another</div>
<div>
Moving just to stop from collapsing</div>
<div>
Hoping that someday</div>
<div>
I will be more than just </div>
<div>
grasping</div>
</div>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-318484808611519192011-06-19T09:52:00.000-07:002012-01-10T20:14:40.209-08:00Do you?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhR7t7OoN3tl7mx3M3TWJ5qEhhLxQWg8iLd0ec8JnrunGD_JdjSy0MDzU85MybCXkjlX-Lhv9zrp8EEZKL8c80n3oJiWDOOVhJA299c1fWcK8MKJAmZBbQ2etrvmNlIZUqe7vMdlk3fcI3b/s1600/dani+and+tree.JPG"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5619977575622898066" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhR7t7OoN3tl7mx3M3TWJ5qEhhLxQWg8iLd0ec8JnrunGD_JdjSy0MDzU85MybCXkjlX-Lhv9zrp8EEZKL8c80n3oJiWDOOVhJA299c1fWcK8MKJAmZBbQ2etrvmNlIZUqe7vMdlk3fcI3b/s400/dani+and+tree.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 265px;" /></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever feel your chest about to burst </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
Just out of sheer affection</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">For that person in front of you</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Oblivious </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever want to shout out</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">This person’s mine</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">This person chose me</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Regardless</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever stop your hand </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">From just touching to assure yourself</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">That person’s there </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Staying </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever hear your heart groan</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Aching for more</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Hungry for something</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Unfathomable </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever gnash your teeth</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Wanting to be more than you can be</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Better, prettier, sweeter</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Desperately</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever feel regret</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">That you weren’t always there</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
To understand the history behind the person</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
You now see</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever feel your eyes fog up</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Just at the thought of losing someone</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Who means more than life</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">To you</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you ever wonder how long</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">A lifetime you still have</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">To spend, to relish </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Together </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Do you?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Because sometimes,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Often,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">Okay, once in a while,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">I do</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">And if you didn’t</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">It would be just so sad</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">For me</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span lang="EN-US">And you</span></div>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4111559117856385415.post-7289989157830945052011-04-20T08:01:00.000-07:002011-04-20T08:02:03.506-07:00Two AngelsAbout my friend A, whose father has never told his other children that he has another daughter. <div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; line-height: 14px; ">Blood binds them<br />Ignorance divides them<br />Fears and lies hide them from the joys of connection<br />And the likely pains of revelation<br />Alone, detached from flesh and blood<br />She aches for a kinship denied<br />And wonders who knows<br />And questions who cares<br />Their father’s sin<br />From ages ago<br />Unconfessed , Unresolved<br />Yet still potent in its power to hurt<br />To deprive<br /><br />To connect?<br />Or not?<br />That is the question the breaks the heart.<br />To reveal<br />To conceal<br />That’s the decision that may liberate<br />Or may scathe<br />Two angels apart<br />One knows<br />One lingers in a haze<br />One waits, her wings clipped<br />One unaware<br />The man that connects them<br />In perpetual denial<br />In a coward’s cloud</span></div>gegehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06091664711747546345noreply@blogger.com1